Get Real or Get Lost!

As I sat on the window seat facing the changing rooms, I could hear my 2 friends shouting through the curtains.

“Stacey – would you grab this in the size 12 please?”

“Could you see if they have this in the silver colour?”

“Not sure I suit this flouncy bit at the bottom of the shirt?”

“The labels must be wrong on these – they won’t even go past my hips”

This last comment made me smile inwardly whilst trying to retain my bored outward expression. Clothes shopping has never been one of my favourite things – in all honesty I loathe it with a passion!

My friend – let’s call her Jane – had pulled back the curtain and was showing me the dark navy skinny jeans that wouldn’t go over her hips. At nearly 6 foot tall and enviously athletic, you could have dressed her in a bed sheet and she would have always looked amazing.

But sure enough – the unforgiving denim was stuck fast around thighs, refusing to budge upwards.

“What size are they?” I asked

“An 8” she replied

“I’ll go find a 10 for you” I offered and started to move off my perch by the window.

“Don’t you dare!” she screamed at me with a look of pure thunder on her face.

You see there was something about Jane that only the closest of her pals knew. She cared far too much about her outward appearance and how she looked to others. She strived endlessly to maintain the façade she was building – but to us, her closest friends, the mask often slipped!

Stacey sat on decking writing in her journal. She is smiling and the wind has messed up her hair.

How familiar is Jane?

I think there is a part of each one of us that wants to look good for others. Something inside of us wants to show up in the ‘right’ way and make the very best first impression. I make no judgements here, but actually speak from my own experience. For too many years I walked around with just the perfect mask on so that I always made the correct impact and was sure to fit in wherever needed.

In my opinion, there is a danger in this thinking when it comes to your business and the online world.

Do you want to show up as something you are not?

Come across in the right and proper way because someone said it would be ‘best’?

Hide your real personality, thoughts or feelings because you want to ‘fit in’?

Follow the crowd and blend in?

The online space is saturated. It’s only going to continue to get fuller, busier and noisier.

You will know 2 or 3 or more folk doing the same as you. You see their posts and their pictures and you immediately start comparing yourself to what they are doing. The doubts start creeping into your head and in some instances it can make you freeze! You question your every move and second guess your own skills.

That’s natural – so never beat yourself up for it!

I teach my clients in the one to one work I do and all the members inside The P.S. Club that nobody else can be them!

You are unique and that single fact is enough to make you different from everyone else.

In the words of Dr Seuss “Today You are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”

Standing in your own truth and leaning into your personality, thoughts and feelings will enable you to stand out from the crowd in the crazy busy online marketplace.

As humans we crave the personal touch – and I don’t just mean skin to skin contact.

I want to understand who it is I am reading about. The person who is telling me about the service or product. Let me into your world a little bit and then I can start to understand who you are. Open up the door into your life and help me get to know the real person behind the logo and brand colours.

When I start to know more about you, I will find it much easier to like the person I see.

When I like the person who is talking to me, I am much more inclined to listen to what you have to say. When I listen properly I am able to decide with a fuller understanding of how your service or product might be beneficial to my life.

Can you see how the relationship can grow from what you share about yourself?

Show up authentically on social media, banish the self doubt and lean into what makes you unique.

If I know that you love dogs, enjoy a walk on the beach and love crusty bread spread thickly with lashing of real butter – you are my person!

There is no quick fix for finding your voice and standing in your truth. It takes time, and practice! The P.S. Club is a safe space in which to try things out and get feedback before speaking to the wider world. Why not join us today and start showing up as authentically you?